Update from the Psych Ward

Update from the Psych Ward

As some of you may know, last week I was hospitalized with what my psychiatrist diagnosed as manic-depressive psychosis. For those unfamiliar with medical jargon it simply means I was in danger of hurting my self or others but would be sad about it if I did. That may be over simplifying it a little but I can tell you it was a frightening experience.

I have had the bipolar (manic depression) for many years now (over 20) and have been successful with keeping it in check after cognitive therapy with medications. This latest episode only reminded me there are continually progressive stages to all of life’s little surprises. It also recalled to my mind the interaction of medications and how they can either strengthen or weaken each other.

After discussing all of my concerns with the doctor, I was started on yet another medication and increased the dosage of one already taken. Keeping track of all this is almost a full time job in itself. I am supposed to take 3 different pills each morning, 4 each noon, and 6 each evening with of course 2 extra drugs I take as needed.

The cost of all these medications is unbelievable even with insurance. Since the beginning of this year (January 1, 2007) I have spent over $500.00 just in co pays for the drugs prescribed. It makes me fear how I will maintain such a budget in the future.

Still, the HIV remains undetectable, the mood swings have stabilized, and I no longer hear, see, or interact with people who are not there. So, maybe the doctors know what they are doing after all. It is difficult keeping 4 different doctors all updated on what each is doing but I do my best each time I see one of them.

Now, I come to the interesting part of all this rambling. I have had a setback but have not yet been stopped. I still believe my faith is what keeps me going and nothing in heaven or earth can prevent that faith from carrying me through.

Though I am often frightened and challenged by the realities of my life, I believe in God. I believe He will not forsake me or forget me. I believe something good is about to happen.